We are reporting to you live, from East Corte Madera, which now marks day 3 of Poopwatch 2013. Here’s an update on what we know: In an effort to motivate results, we’ve deployed a plethora of special agents both chemical and psychological to do the job at hand. They are, and are not limited to: Miralax, Smooth Moves Tea, Colace, Ativan, and plenty fluid intake. Unfortunately, despite these measures, and after consulting with many PW’s (Poop Whisperers), we have not seen the targeted results we were hoping for. Never say never!
Miss J: Wait a minute, did someone just say ‘Never Say Never?’ That’s a JB song!
Me: I know! It’s your fave.
Miss J: It used to be my fave, but now it’s ‘Fall.’
I still have a bag of tricks up my sleeve (or to be more precise, items in a bag from the pharmacy) that I can try. So fear not people, I am confident I will have news to share that will provide the conclusion and final chapter of PW2013 very, very soon!
In other news, today was my first full day at home back with the regular routine of the kids going to school and M going to work. I spent most of the day in my Command Center Chair in my bedroom, surrounded by the remote, my iPhone, iPad mini, laptop, wallet, a stack of magazines, chapstick, headphones and pillows. Yes, I can easily rule the world from this set-up.
[Actually, if you may permit me to brag, I did manage to purchase a few Hannukah presents, reserve tickets for Miss J’s Holiday Singing Performance, schedule a Dr’s appointment, get advance birthday presents for CZ&J’s friends’ upcoming parties, all while knocking out 3 episodes of The Mindy Project and The Good Wife and 1 episode of Pretty Little Liars. Not bad, eh?]
On the physical side of things, I’m a whole lotta sore in not just the “all the right places” but in other areas as well. This affects my breathing, specifically as the pain from my chest and ribs and midsection prevents me from taking proper deep breaths, which is really important to do. So I was given a breath toy from the hospital to work on to increase my range of breath. I’m also itchy from the pain meds, so M must gently massage my shoulders and back and arms with arnica cream to help.
On the emotional side of things, I’m so relieved to be home and done with the surgery. It’s at times like these when I’m facing a long road to recovery ahead, which involves a tremendous amount of down time, that I’m super proud of my heritage coming from such a long line of “experienced resters.” I’m not sure if I’ve explicitly shared my dad’s mad resting skills or the theory that if there was an Olympic Sport in marathon resting, my dad would have not just medaled multiple times, but also would have held the all-time record. Let’s just say that my dad can nap circles around your dad. Neener-neener. So there.
We gave the intern a few days off last week and he spent the weekend at Angels Camp with his brother Murphy. I think he needed some brother bonding time and we are so grateful to Team Weiny for taking such good care of him! Welcome home Lucky!