full confession

Time to come clean. I’ve been doing more than my fair share of online shopping under the influence (OSUI). Last week the day after my surgery, I had trouble sleeping, and I was up until 5am. What’s a gal to do after she’s popped a few “Perkies” while she waits for sleep to overtake her? Yep, you guessed it – online shopping time!

I wish I could tell you the things I picked out filled my closet and filled my heart with tremendous satisfaction. Or that what I bought were things I had been long looking for and suddenly a-ha! found them so was thrilled to receive them. Or…that they were really even cute.

No, no and no.

Packages have been arriving this week and they’re all going back. I’m not keeping one thing. Sure, some of the things are Just Not Cute. And others are cute, but I don’t really need. So back they all go. The people at the UPS store know me by name. We’re tight like that. Feels very much like Fly-Fishing, catch and release style. So maybe the thrill is in the “hunt” – I don’t know.

I originally subtitled this blog “going through breast cancer one outfit at a time” and it’s still very much a part of my CJ. Going from ample chest to medium small chest changes your whole body proportions in such a way that I’ve found that clothes that used to work now don’t, and clothes that didn’t before, now do. It’s been a learning experience for me – learning to dress my budding breasts. I’m having fun with it actually.

It’s day 10 post surgery and I still have my friendly copilot the Drain with me. I am hoping to get it removed on Friday, but again, it all depends on then output. This means I can’t shower so I’ve become quite adept at the sponge bath scenario, and shaving my legs in the sink. Oh, good times. On the pain front, I’m sore mostly where the drain port is and the side and my back. But I’m able to do most things except lift anything over 1-2 lbs on that side. I’m mostly back to my regular routine, but I’m just so tired. It’s to be expected – my body has endured a lot in 6 months – so I’m trying to be super mindful.

Speaking of mindful…I feel the need to share a sweet story about my other copilot M, after his insensitive and not-at-all-funny comment about my alleged maternity ensemble the other day. I just received a phone call from He Who Doesn’t Remember Anything to wish me a happy anniversary. Yep, it was 27 years ago today on May 8, 1987, that a boy who needed a haircut and wore a Powdermilk Biscuits T-shirt, and a girl who was way too tan for her own good and had yellow hurache sandals first hooked up.

“Wow – can you believe it’s been 27 years?” I asked. “Think about everything that’s happened to us and what we’ve done together.” I was thinking about Grateful Dead concerts, Proms, Backpacking through Europe in college, breaking up, getting back together, Law School, more travel, Business School, babies, house, dog, not to mention a few minivans and pounds we accumulated along the way. I was thinking about how at 16, we could not have predicted our journey together and the milestones we’d celebrate, the challenges we’d endure, and the the memories we’d create.

I won’t repeat his answer here, because it might spoil the touchy-feely moment we’re having here – but suffice it to say, and it should come as no surprise to anyone, that his answer included a little subversive humor about my drain, my wonky left boob, and other ways we’re “doing great.” Funny guy. I think I’ll keep him.

Off to the UPS store to see my friends and return packages….one outfit at a time!




3 Responses

  1. I remember this 80 lb weakling and this darling young girl of 15 just beginning Lowell High School. They met very quickly. I remember them coming to my house and dancing to a record in our den. Wow, can you believe that was almost over 50 years ago. Imagine all of the experiences of their life. It brings back so many memories. There were Sweet 16 parties, proms, and all of the fun times. C and C were the “COUPLE”. Alot to show for all of those years. They were and are the best parents as you and M are. The Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Just you wait until C and Z or J come home in love. Think about it, not too many years off if they follow your tradition. Yikes! That’s a scary thought. We need to cherish our memories. So much fun looking back.
    A and R will be married 20 years in July. They also began at age 15.
    You have really taken me back with your blog today.
    C’S pix

  2. Laughing out loud again. Just love your blog, Jennifer.
    Happy Anniversary to you and M – I cannot believe 27 years!!!
    You two look like you’re only 27 for gawd sakes!
    Many more adventures to come and memories to make.
    Keep on Shoppin’!
    Heart, liza

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